Ideas for Strengthening a New Relationship
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Hi ,
You’ve had a great first date, and then maybe a second, and now you’re pretty sure you’re starting to like this person
you’ve been slowly getting to know — but what next?
How do you keep your relationship moving forward in the right way and at a good pace?
While all relationships have their ups and downs, especially in the beginning stages, there are ways you can strengthen and build your new relationship by
investing in it.
With that in mind, here are some great ideas for building this new relationship you’re excited about, so you can see where it’s going to lead:
- Ask Questions. A big part of early dating is discovering more and more about each other. Try to ask questions about the other person’s friends and family, job, interests,
current events, etc. The more he/she reveals to you in conversation, the more you get to know about this person and learn about what motivates, drives and inspires the way he/she lives. Be sure to listen attentively and try to remember everything you’re told — this builds a stronger bond between you.
- Find Small Ways to Be Thoughtful. Small but thoughtful gifts and gestures go a long way in the beginning of a relationship, so look for
ways to be intentionally thoughtful. Did your date tell you that she loves a certain brand of dark chocolate that’s hard to find? See if you can order a bar and give it to her the next time you meet. Did the guy you’ve been getting to know say something about how he’s always wanted to go to a certain restaurant? Suggest meeting there the next time he calls. “Small gifts are often more meaningful than bigger gifts on special occasions as they provide reminders of the relationship more often than
gifts on special occasions,” says Thanh Lu at Life Optimizer.
- Be Responsive and Communicate. One of the biggest hurdles new couples often have to overcome is learning how to communicate with each other. If one person doesn’t respond to texts or phone calls,
the other is likely to get frustrated and wonder what’s going on. If someone sends mixed messages (“I like you,” “I don’t like you”), it can stop a relationship in a hurry. If you know you’re interested in this person you’re seeing, be responsive and communicative. Answer questions, respond to voicemails and don’t leave long chunks of time between communicating. Likewise, be alert to strange behavior from the other person — is he/she bad at responding, or is he/she sending you a message?
Better to discover communication issues now than to get entrenched in them down the road.
- Reveal Yourself Honestly and Openly, Over Time. It’s not just getting to know the other person that’s important in a new relationship; it’s also him/her getting to know you. Make it possible by answering questions honestly and openly, even if it requires you to be vulnerable, as long as you feel comfortable in that way. Over time, the longer you
know each other and the more you spend time together, gradually reveal more and more. No relationship will truly be able to progress unless you share your real self, so let your true colors come out.
- Be Thankful. Gratitude grows relationships, so even in the early stages of a relationship, make it a point to be thankful for the kind actions your partner does for you. You may even wish to keep a gratitude journal of loving things your
partner does or that you notice about him/her, as Tess Marshall writes at The Change Blog. Find things to praise, and focus on the good.
- Have Fun Together. It sounds simple, but taking time to
play together is crucial for bonding and developing a closer relationship. What’s more, “studies show that couples who take part in fun activities and laugh together feel closer and more satisfied in the relationship,” says online flower delivery company ProFlowers.
- Give It
Time. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and this relationship likely won’t be, either. Take time to get to know this new person and let things happen naturally, organically, in a way that feels comfortable to you both. New relationships are often fragile, and if you rush ahead too quickly, you risk scaring the other person off.
New relationships are exciting, fun and a little scary — but enjoy the journey. Every deep love started somewhere. By
following the tips above for strengthening your budding romance, you’ll be able to nurture it and watch it grow.
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